wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
