Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
