Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
