If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
