Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize