so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Someone came in the potted fern
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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