She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
how do you play pong handcuffed?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Never joke about your clitoris.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
