singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
