Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry blexrude hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%

Fav 14 1189 2601
share tweet
(908): View more from New Jersey

he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?

Fav 84 1151 6283
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can

Fav 28 1042 4616
share tweet
(780): View more from Alberta, CA

She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on

Fav 14 4503 938
share tweet
(516): View more from New York

until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life

Fav 13 4020 1460
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!

Fav 4 2807 1237
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(413): View more from Massachusetts

I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?

(908): View more from New Jersey

It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.

Fav 3 2426 914
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(469): View more from Texas

Where is everybody?

(214): View more from Texas

It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.

Fav 0 55 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(561): View more from Florida

He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.

Fav 0 54 14
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT