From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
