She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
You dont lie about slip and slides
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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