I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
