Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
