i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize
