i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
