Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
