Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
