Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
