I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
