This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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