when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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