So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
