as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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