Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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