You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
only if we run a train.
done.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
