Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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