Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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