just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
