i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
