I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize