My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
