good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize