How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Dick very happy bro
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
