In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
