remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
