return my video game
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
