Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize