VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
