did you get engaged???
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
