Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I can't turn off my feet"
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize