how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
