I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She needs sedatives and a leash
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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