Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
