So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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