It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I look better un-naked...
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
