Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
