Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
