It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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