Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
