FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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